Wednesday, April 21, 2010


Still Trying to get over this Crud that I have.  It has been hanging in there for a while now.  Not fun at all.  I get tired just walking to the mailbox.  While it is hanging in I have no energy to do anything.  I and starting to get into a funk, and that makes me eat more than I should.  It is a hideous cycle that I can't seem to break.  Every time I feel like I am making some headway something else comes up to mess we up.  There is so much that I wish I could do that I just can't because the weight is holding me back, but I just really can't seems to shake it.  It has been with me most of my life and I feel like it will always be with me.  I don't want to be like this.  I know it isn't good for me.  I know I need to lose weight.  I know.  I just can't seem to do.  And it is so frustrating.  I know all the right things to do.  I know what I shouldn't be eating.  I know I should be getting more exercise.  But is just isn't happening.  There is a huge difference between knowing that to do and actually doping it.  I have the knowing part down pat.  And I can do the doing part for a little while.  I just really want the whole trying to lose weight thing to be done.  It is all that I have been trying to do for years, and I feel like such a failure!  When all you do is fail, It gets even harder to try!

I Just want this one thing.  Everything else in my life is pretty good.  I Just want to lose weight.  I just need to stop trying...and do...

Til Then,

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